This is not imaginary.

This morning a random cab driver offered me a Hacks due to my incessant coughing. I almost lost it.

I've been really sick this time, a week today and I've been feeling really sorry for myself.

The last time I was this sick, Kak J came over to take me to the clinic. This time round, I had to drive myself. I must have spent 5 minutes crying before I even started driving.

What an ungrateful bitch.

I have loads of female support. One helped call the cafe downstairs to order food for me cause I've lost my voice and too sick to go out. One gave me rides back from work. And a few over the years  have helped me financially when things got really bad. And of course the ketat kemban gang who listened, sympathised and entertained me over the years.

My closest friends are not girls I went to school or uni with but ladies I met online some 7 years ago. We haven't known each other that long but somehow we're close. No subject is taboo.

I'm grateful.